Christian missionary raises the sword of jihad
In a recent development, the gang of medrassa-trained, Arab-colonialist mullahs who head the Maldive republican authorities have begun accusing the head of a British charity of being an Islamic terrorist. Even if this were true it is akin to the kettle calling the pot black. Up until the day before the accusation was first made, the Maldive ruling mullahs had, for months, accused the Englishman of being a Christian missionary dedicated to proselytising Maldivians into Christianity. Orwellian double-think is an everyday reality in Arab-colonialist Maldives.

Amused disbelief and even shock horror are being expressed in some quarters over this dramatic turn in the accusations of the mullahs heading the Maldive republican authorities. However the Official Website of the Maldive Royal Family finds the attitude of the mullahs historically consistent with the thinking in certain sectors of Maldive society, particularly those afflicted by Arab colonialist indoctrination.

T in the word cigar
A typical case of this warped logic was documented during the period of the first Maldive republic in 1953. The short-lived republican authorities of the time had imposed a ban on the import and consumption of any tobacco-related products. Maldive customs and excise were overcome with paranoia over the possibility of even a single leaf of contraband tobacco being smuggled into the islands. A crate of cargo was unloaded that lacked any labelling except a huge letter T written on the outside. The inspectors of the republican customs and excise did not even want to open the item of cargo to determine what it contained. They convinced themselves beyond any doubt that the lone letter represented the “T in the word cigar” (the Maldive word for cigar is “suttaa”). The crate was immediately consigned to fire!

Buddha used in Christian worship

Much later in the mid 1990s, during the time of the currently incumbent republican administration, headed by the gang of Egyptian-trained mullahs, a cross-cultural mixed marriage couple arrived at Malé International Airport. Maldive customs officials are particularly nasty on mixed-marriage couples without family connections to the ruling gang of mullahs, particularly when a Maldive woman is married to a Western man. That was the case with this particular couple, Michael and Fareesha O'Shea, later of Maldives Culture.

Officials rummaging through the couple’s luggage, allegedly looking for pornography, arms and ammunition found a 15cm high green statuette of Buddha valued at A$200 that Michael's father had given him and which he used as a paper-weight.

The Maldive statute on contraband goods mentions the Buddha, pork and pornography in the same clause. For some reason, the Virgin Mary missed out on the classification!

Heavily armed National Security Service (NSS) personnel were immediately called to the scene. The contraband Buddha along with a scholarly book on the life of Mohamed and a large history of Islamic peoples were seized and Fareesha arrested. Buddha, Mohamed's biography, Fareesha and the history book were then driven to the military headquarters in Malé in a van. An unarmed woman officer sat beside Fareesha in the van, while two men with fingers on the trigger of their AK-47assault rifles stood by. Every precaution in the military manual had to be taken against Buddha.

Buddhist chant

Fareesha was led to a dingy prison cell with blood-stained walls where she was forced to sign a confession of attempting to import a “Lord Buddha used in Christian worship”! The statement was written in Divehi by the officials and referred to Buddha as "Lord". It is possible that the Arab-colonialist Maldive mullahs regard the Buddha as a lord beside Allah.

Later Michael arrived at the military headquarters where he met with a valiant repulsion by a heroic NSS officer armed with an AK-47 assault rifle. There was a Japanese man there who told Michael he was looking for his wallet. Michael told him he was looking for his wife. Perhaps the Japanese man wondered if Michael had a kamikaze wife.

Fareesha was bailed out later in the afternoon, following mediation by the then deputy minister of education. Trying to sound very learned, one of the neanderthals who pass as Maldive military officers told her that the books would be returned after he had read them. With a twinkle in his eye, he also asked her if he might pay her a visit that evening!

Even if the Koran changed
It is worth recalling a word of wisdom that the Late Athireegey Abdul Hameed Didi imparted on this writer’s eldest brother circa 1943. Mr Hameed Didi had been the Maldive ambassador to the British government in what was then known as Ceylon for the greater part of the early 20^th century and my brother was a young pupil attending Royal College in Colombo. “Maldivians”, Mr Hameed Didi counselled my brother, “will never change even if the Koran did”! Decades later and with every other hand-drawn cart pusher and his burqa-clad harem looking at writing doctoral dissertations, old Mr Hameed Didi’s words still ring true.